Woke up this morning feeling dead. There was noone to help me out of bed , so i dragged myself onto my chair but i couldn't sit up so was half on chair and half on the bed. Took me ages to sit up. I then went to the bathroom and attempted to get dressed. When I'm having a bad day i literally cannot move. Finally found someone to put my trousers and shoes on. I confess that i still have my socks on from yesterday as i couldn't change them. I rushed to have abit of breakfast, take meds and flush my feeding tube.
The first class was tai chi. I didn't know what to expect from the class. I was thinking it was some form of karate. I hoped so anyway.
My hopes were dashed in an instant. We all sat around in a circle while a lady said we need to close our eyes and visualise things. We then had to move our arms and legs. Brilliant in theory but i have no sense of where my limbs are in space. If i close my eyes my arms could end up anywhere.
My eyes had to stay open so i didn't really get much out if it. I was quite embarrassed as my feeding pump does a whirling sound every few minutes. Not good in a quiet room.
The lady used such words as ' effortless posture' and you will be 'revised and energised'. I thought this meant i was going to be like a duracell bunny, but i was more like a slug.
I didn't have another session for 45mins but i waited up in physio as my chair isn't charging well so i needed all the power i could get.
Next was to see my o.t. We went straight into the bathroom. I immediately saw the bath and thought this was my kind of therapy, a long soak in the tub. It was not to be.
We talked about getting up, washed and dressed and how i'm managing.
I brought up that i was struggling with the lack of care on the wards and she is going to talk to the ward staff about it.
We came up with some solutions for my problems. Aids such as a long handled sponge, a thing that helps you to put your socks on and different baskets for dirty clothes. Also to put washing on the worktop instead of the floor to save bending.
We then talked about my carers and how they need to do more work but also slow down and give me time in between showering and dressing. They tend to lug me out of bed and are only there about 30 mins instead of an hour.
After discussing all this my o.t said i looked very tired and we should finish early.
Sadly no rest in between as i was off to a session in relaxation
Intro to relaxation
By this point i was exhausted. I was sort of listening but only caught little bits. My mind wondered. Here are my thoughts while i was trying to listen .
No idea what it is about, is it bed time yet.
I'm freezing cold.
I wonder if i'm going to get a chance to charge my chair
Need matchsticks to hold my eyes open but its a non smoking building so could be difficult.
The lady said something about a person getting bitten by a snake but don't worry relaxation will help.
Picture of a leopard asleep on a tree, very jealous of mr leopard
I've got nothing left to give. Help
The lady then went onto talk about laughter therapy and my first thoughts were ' i don't think she would appreciate it if i starting laughing.
I then thought it might not be appropriate to laugh when your at a funeral. Yes i have random thoughts.
Next stop is an intro to assertiveness
We touched on subjects such as being aggressive, passive and assertive. I don't think theres much to say on this subject but i did wish real life was like sky tv where you can stop and rewind.
Yes i am still alive just. Physio was only half hour and something she said made me burst into tears. She asked me what i was upset about but i knew i would come across as defensive (see im learning ) if i told her she had upset me, so i decided to not tell her and think it over. We then went off to the sports centre and i realised i was rubbish at basketball, tabletennis and badminton.
Im now in bed after a very long day. Lets see what tomorrow brings x