reflecting on turning 33 and getting grey hair

So next week on the 12th July it's my birthday.I will be the grand old age of 33. Yikes. How did i get to 33 and not feel any different to when i was 18. The grey hair is creeping in but luckily my boobs aren't big enough to go down south yet.

I've been doing some reflecting on the hopes and dreams i had when i was younger. Life isn't how i imagined it would be. I thought by this time i would be married with children and have a good job.Well thats whats supposed to happen isn't it. Were the movies lying to me all this time and not many people have their happy ever after.

This post sounds depressing already but i will chuck in a few more depressing things to really get the vibe going.  I became ill at 19. If i hadn't of become unwell then i wouldn't have gone to uni at 23 to carry on what i left off at 18. I'm confusing myself here.

I then lost the ability to walk five years ago and then my stomach stopped working about 3 years ago ,so i've been tube fed/ tpn dependent for 2 years. I have dated in this time but i never met the right person.I don't have alot of confidence as i think i'm alot for a person to take on.

I also won't be having children as i don't think it would be fair on a child, but its not all doom and gloom.

Although my life has taken a different path than i imagined it has taught me so much. I appreciate little things like flowers growing or birds singing. I make the most of my good days as you never know when your going to get sick.I appreciate family and never take things for granted. I think i have a good life and overall i can say i'm happy.

Even more happy that i got i'd for a scratchcard.I burst out laughing but the cashier was serious.

So to end my speech, here is a photo of me in my new glasses.My carer calls them my geek glasses haha.

I hope you all have a good day

Hayley x